life is full of ups and downs.. so, live your life to the fullest…

Duhai kekasih pujaan hatiku
Apakah kau memberiku satu arti
Sedikit rasa yang bisa kumengerti
Bukan sumpah atau janji

Buktikanlah bila ada cinta
Setulus hatimu bisa menerima
Sebatas kejujuran yang kau miliki
Bukan sekedar bersama

Jujurlah padaku bila kau tak lagi cinta
Tinggalkan aku
Bila tak mungkin bersama
Jauhi diriku lupakanlah aku
O… Ho… O… Ho…

Jujurlah padaku bila kau tak lagi suka
Tinggalkan aku
Bila tak mungkin bersama
Jauhi diriku lupakanlah aku
Selamanya
*******************************************************************************************************************

erm..mesti ramai kan yang suka lagu jujur by radja ni?? think that the lyrics ..mmm..yalah, as for me, i have some memory with this song.. hahahah..  urmm.. just let it be.. suruh orang jujur, tapi dia tak jujur pon..camne tu eh? aahhh..susahnye nak paham makhluk yang bernama lelaki ni.. kalau tak suke, cakap jelah kan..i can accept it la..don’t worry, i won’t hang myself or berdiri kat tgh2 laluan keretapi tuh.. apepon, u teach me the meaning of "jujur"

………………………………………………………………..

there’s another song.. erm..nice lyric i think..APA SAJA by KRU

Apa saja untukmu
Tak ku hiraukan waktu
Katakan saja ‘kan ku laksana
Permaisuri kau bertakhta di jiwa
Apa saja untukmu
Ke dasar lautan biru
Bertaruh nyawa andai kau damba
Mutiara…di hari lahirmu
Kita menuju gemilang asmara
Tiada cinta setanding kita
Ku rela sehingga ke akhirnya
Tunai segala mimpi mu
Uhh…ratuku

Untukmu kasih
Ku cuba meraih
Bintang di angkasa
Walau tak terdayakan ku ikhtiar
Untukmu kasih
Gembira bersedih
Selagi ku bernyawa
Untukmu kasih, ku korban apa saja

Apa saja untukmu
‘Kan ku ubah caraku
Jikalau itu yang kau mahu
Apa saja demi kebahgiaanmu

Bukanku pinta yang luarbiasa
Cuma secebis janji setia
Inilah…lagu cinta kita
Hanya terbaik untukmu
Selama-lamanya

urmm..kekadang bile dgr lagu ni..ade gak cam sebak2.. apa saja konon.. ntah pape je janji.. ala..manade manusia perfect, kan?

apepon..hopefully that i’ll find the other half of me soon.. the one who will be honest and willing to love me as who I am.. ada apa dengan cinta????

wulla..it’s 4 am..coming to the second half of da game..france already scored one, a penalty by zizou at 33 minutes of the first half game when henry was tackled by ricardo carvalho.. portugal avtually have some great chances with their strikers - deco, cristiano ronaldo, maniche and not to forget mr captain, luis figo. the game has started lorh.. let’s watch..

hurm,what a great chances for henry..huh, great save by ricardo anyway!! looks like french man controlled the game.. they were in the high spirit,huh? apelah agaknye coach kurus kecik derang tu kasik tonik? hhehehhe..

go pauleta..uppss.. what a miss..alrite, it’s a corner for portugal..erm..too far!!why did people like to kick the ball rite to the middle in front of the goal.. i think that they are just wasting the ball.. aren’y they? erm..they should try another technique la..

scolari - garang tul mamat boroi nih.. think that ref arini cam berat ke perancis kot.. but it’s cool,no yellow card yet!

uwaa…cam malas nak menaip..alamak abang miguel ku kuar..injured ke..ces..takpe2 ..go..go.. cayla..let’s focus..tak kirelah who’s going to meet my team itali in da final.. forza azzuri..chiow..

erm..do you want to see the specimen that has been removed by the doctor during the operation? want? don’t want? nak..tak nak?ok..ok.. i’ll show u later..

semalam g hospital..bukak balutan..alhamdulillah, tak terbukak kesan operation tuh..erm, still kene makan ubat la.. sebab kandungan darah dalam badan sangatlah masih kurang..

balik dari hospital tuh..makcik2 jiran ni datang melawat.. mula2 sorang..pastu datang sorang lagi…pastu datang lagi… sumenye adelah 7-8 orang.. masa derang datang tu, g lah dapo nak buat air..tapi kene marah plak.. yelah..sebab angkat barang berat..ala, abis tu..takkan tak kasik minum? banyaklah pantang larang yang aku dapat..nak tau tak apa? mak pon dapat petua camne nak mask ikan haruan,.. semalam abah belik ikan haruan 2 ekor..uish..melenting2 derang dok dalam baldi tuh..

"aziyan( makcik2 kejiranan used to called me with that name)ni, tak payah buat air..kan berat tu..kalau cik tau nak pegi buat air tadi, cik tak kasi..ingatkan pergi bilik air"

"jangan angkat benda2 yang berat"

"yan(ade certain panggil camni, pendek sket)..kang tak payah gerak banyak2 sangat, rehat2 aje..takut tertetas pulak kang jahitan tuh.."

"sapu-sapu sampah tu jangan buat dulu, takut merekah"

"jangan dok mencangkung"..(luckily ade satu tandas duduk kat umah)

and the list ….adelah lagi..so..now i want to show you the "things"

ni la die..yang besar tu saiz 8.0cm x 7.0cm x 5.0 cm and the small one sized 3.0cm x 3.0cm x 2.5cm

hah..ni pulak dokto belah the specimen..nak tgk apa ade..kanser or other effect..alhamdulillah takde ape2..ape yang korang nampak?

erm..that’s it..hopefully azie cepat sembuh..ikut segala pantang larang cam org bersalin.. amin..

erm…poor jerman..tgh tgk replay game pagi tadi.. a very teriffic game ..don’t it? it’s just another 3 minutes time to the penalti shot, but giasso scored a very2 beautiful goal..seriously..the best ever goal i ever seen through this world cup..then, in another minute del piero scored another goal, which make all the people in Jerman cried? hahahha.. italy just make my guess come true..will they have the world cup in their home? we’ll see them in final then..there’s one of my friend said that he don’t want to go to work today.."nak berkabung jerman kalah"..the other day, my brazil’s fan friend also do the same when brazil lost to france in da quarter final..

wualla…world cup could make the people also killed themselves rite? there’s a japan man who did it when japan not even win a game during their group match.. to all football fan out there.. i just can say that.."bola tu bulat" anything could happen, and it is not possible if portugal would win the game against france and meet itali in da final..

what so eva..german pon main best gak..it just that italy man is just so good..especially the captain!! la viva..

Recently I overheard a mother and daughter in their
last moments together at the airport. They had
announced the departure. Standing near the security
gate, they hugged and the mother said, "I love you and
I wish you enough". The daughter replied, "Mom, our
life together has been more than enough. Your love is
all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Mom".

They kissed and the daughter left. The mother walked
over to the window where I was seated. Standing there
I could see she wanted and needed to cry. I tried not
to intrude on her privacy but she welcomed me in by
asking, "Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing
it would be forever?" "Yes, I have," I replied.
"Forgive me for asking, but why is this a forever
good-bye?"

"I am old and she lives so far away. I have challenges
ahead and the reality is - the next trip back will be
for my funeral," she said.

"When you were saying good-bye, I heard you say, ‘I
wish you enough’. May I ask what that means?"

She began to smile. "That’s a wish that has been
handed down from other generations. My parents used to
say it to everyone".

She paused a moment and looked up as if trying to
remember it in detail and she smiled even more. "When
we said, ‘I wish you enough’, we were wanting the
other person to have a life filled with just enough
good things to sustain them".

Then turning toward me, she shared the following as if
she were reciting it from memory.

I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright
I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.
I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.
I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in
life appear much bigger.
I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you
possess.
I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final
good-bye.

She then began to cry and walked away.

They say ….it takes a minute to find a special person,

                   an hour to appreciate them,

                   a day to love them,

                   but then an entire life to forget them.

erm, a very touching story rite? semalam my old friend called, rupa-rupanya dia dah kawin..alhamdulillah, the guy is the one that she ever loved ..hhahaha…semoga berbahagia, girl..

today birthday abang cruise..erm.semoga dia berbahagia di samping katie holmes yang dah gemuks itu ngan anak die yang nama suri tuh.. janganlah cerai2 lagi coz nicole kidman pon dah kawin ngan keith urban.. to yuyu also..HAPPY 23rd BIRTHDAY..WELCOME TO OUR WORLD.. mesti dapat lagi adiah dari cik abang kan? last weekend dapat cincin..arini dapat apa ye? hiihi..apepon, may all happiness will always be yours..

untuk azie..erm..esok jumpe dokto..nak bukak balutan..hopefully tak sakit.. wish me luck kawan-kawan..

maybe some of u guys dah tau yang azie budak comel ni masuk hospital kene bedah..well, i got fibroid..tau tak ape tuh? that is ketumbuhan dalam perut..masa dokto scan tu..i can see the 7 cm fibroid and the other one..smaller than that, maybe about 3 cm.. erm, masa dokto kata "u’ve got big problem girl, ade fibroid ni" rasa cam nak pengsan..mata bergenang dah.. nasib baik ade mak teman..so rasa takdelah lonely..tgk mak pon sedih.. uwaa… so i have 2 be refered to johor specialist hospital @ hospital pakar johor..

pas mak tepon abah,(g ngan mak ngan adik je)straight je pusing2 jb carik hospital pakar..huhu, nama je org johor, tapi mmg tak pas jalan2 kat jhr ni..mmg takleh jadik pemandu pelancong..well., jumpe gakla after 15 minutes pusing2.. tanya kat registration..pastu die suruh pilih dokto..ade 5 dokto..taktau nak pilih yang mana..ade 5..4 laki, sorang pompuan.. 3 china,1 melayu, 1 india.. tanye mak,mak kata ikut akak la..so i chose the first name in da list..DR MAK.. cine.. lalala..apsal tak pilih dokto melayu? ntahla..

then masuk jumpe dokto..scan lagi..kompem mmg ade 7 cm fibroid tu..die kata kalau nak buat operation..hari selasa boleh..isnin kene daftar masuk la..actually berat hati nak buat operation ni..the deposit is 5K.. erm..adik nak daftar u sabtu ni..pastu ina ngan arif pon nak pakai duit gak naik sem baru..masa tu mmg dah nangis gile2..laju jek air mata jatuh kat pipi..uhhuhhu..mak pon nagis sama.. mak kata " takpela, kalau abah takde duit, pakai duit mak..kalau biarkan, nanti makin besar pulak, akak yang susah..mak pon susah hati gak" huhu..makin banyak la plak cik air mata ni merembes kuar.. sian mak abah, kene kuar duit untuk aku..banyak kan 5000 tu?

after a long thinking, i agreed to proceed the operation.. alhamdulillah, it was a success..thanks to mak, abah, adik, arif,along, angah, mak usu, nyai, tok su and family.. uncles( uncle jep, cik amet, maman bakar) yang tolong donate darah..sebab kene ganti 4 pn darah yang kene masuk kat aku yang kurang darah ni.. thanks to ili and kawan2 kelas MCSE yang datang melawat..terharu sangat…satu kelas 14 org datang.. korang memang best,..even kita baru je kenal seminggu..thanks..doakan aku cepat sembuh tau..korang mesti rindu aku tak datang kelas..

so, to all of you especially girls, bile rasa sakit perut yang lain macam especially bila period time, glah jumpe dokto and scan.. sebab b4 this ade gak jumpe dokto but derang kata it’s a normal senggugut..so kalau ade any of ur sis, girlfriend or sedara mara yang ade penyakit camni.. do take care.. prevention is better than cure..

so..doakan azie cepat sembuh..leh lari2, rempit2.. tak sabar nak masuk kelas..rindu kat kawan2 and mr dhevan.. chow..

now is the live match between portugal and neitherland. so many yellow cards, 2 portugal players has been sent out, red cards, deco la one of them, also one player from neitherland….upss..figo has been changed.. another 5 minutes to go..can portugal survive? uhuhuh..think that this is the worst ever game i ever watched..ten yellow cards? i think.. then, the players really, really aggressive.. both team really want to make it to the quarter final.. wualla, nice save from ricardo.. another half second, 6 minutes additional time.. anything could be happened..  let see wether arjen and da gang would score a goal, make it to the penalty shot?

90 + 4 –another red card.. total up there were 4 or them.. 2 for portugal, 2 for neitherland..ermm,tiago missed a shot.. corner..will it make another foal for portugal? nope..erm, its over 6 minutes already? yeah, that’s it is.. potugal will meet england..lalalal… see ya in da quarter…

today..13th June 2006..it’s been 23 years i lived in this world..(pobondo la ayat?) ahahah..actually nak tulis semalam..(now ni dah 14 hb- baru abis game france-urmmm,…seri je)tapi semalam really ngantuk pas tgk game USA-Republic Czech..bosan gile game…cam game MyTeam lawan Malaysia arituh..serius cakap..u guys sape yang tengok kompem leh cakap camtu.. uwaaa…lombab..ntah sape2 jek bola tu di’passing’, tak best cam game sweden lawan trinidad tobago..even takde gol,tapi best bangat tengok..rasa cam aku join sekali je dak2 tu main.. hahahha..ape cite pasal bola ni? urmm..actually tgh tunggu game brazil-croatia ni.. aii..kompem esok dengar ceramah mak baru bgn ni… uwaa…

well..nak say thanks a lot pada sape2 yang wish birthday kat me myself…my family especially…thanks for the cake.. sedap..sape nak..sile datang umah…ade lagi cek simpan.. then..msg2 yang sampai kat henset..kat friendster… erm… kredit dah expired, malas nak topup.. tau2 jelah kan, dok kat umah..sume the important persons were right beside me, so no need to send sms or calling2, leh cakap straight je..   lom jumpa lagi my dear soulmate (bile?).. uhuuhuh..so, thanks ya..i wish that all my dreams and hope will be granted.. (apsal rasa ayat cam tak betul?) lantakla..

oklah..actually tadi cam banyak je nak cerita..tapi cam malas.. erm…game will start soon.. meh tgk meh samba brazil leh menang tak…aha, suke sangat lagu yang dicipta khas tuh…sape ade..best2..tgk pakcik2 tu joget2..huhuhuhu..

erm..ade lagi nak cite..tapi..lenkali la.. urm..see ya then.. daa..

"HAPPY 23rd BIRTHDAY for me..RAZIANA HJ OTHMAN"

yeah..mei is da month of all days… hari mak..hari cikgu..hari belia..hari nurse..and the day that i won’t ever forget… hari my beloved one hilang… my beloved JGR 6510.. my red KRISS.. sian baby, tak sempat nak sambut birthday on august nanti.. sedih sangat2.. yelah..almost four years u were  always by my side.. kene ujan sama-sama, pecut laju2 lari dari pakcik misai..g jusco..g round jb.. g keje.. pasni, kalau dapat keje..kene jalan kaki ke? takmo bawak kete.. nanti mati2… i hate cars..really fobia..erm.. very the jahat one sape yang curik..kat masjid pulak tuh.. JAHAT NYE MANUSIA tuh…( layak ke makhluk2 ni dipanggil manusia?) - nyusahkan hidup orang lain je.. :((

well…to my mom.. HAJAH RAHMAH…Happy Mother’s Day.. Thanks 4 all ur sacrifice…ur guide..hopefully one day i’ll be the greatest mom just like u…

erm..selamat pengantin baru buat INTAN & HISHAM… semoga ikatan ini kekal hingga akhir hayat.. cantik je Intan masa majlis nikah tadi..all pink..kene plak die putih.. alhamdulillah hisham dengan sekali lafaz je …sah jadi suami Intan..

erm..so..AZIE bile? alahai soalan.. insyaALLAH kalau ade jodoh tak ke mana kan? cuma taktau bila, ngan sape.. sape? entah lah.. life is complicated aight?

rite..balik dari umah intan..there u go..ade van..kete 2 bijik.. owh..my uncle + auntie + cousins datang.. siap bawak tomyam plus cake all da way dari pontian nak celebrate mom’s 50th birthday..

and then tomorrow..(today la-1st mei..my cousin’s birthday-SHASHA LISA ABDUL HAMID..)-Hahaha..sori dear,takde hadiah.. she will get married at the end of this yer.. and she told me-"k.yana wajib datang,jadi pengapit orang.." lalalalal…yela…insyaALLAH..

esok derang nak mandi laut..not sure nak g balau ke( ade pesta balau sempena 1st mei ni) or batu layar..ape-apepon..both of this place surely full of people… bet me..tadi masa nak sampai my house..leh plak jammed jalan nak g balau tuh..time camni la polis buat roadblock..banyak tu dapat…so guys..get ur license first before get in ur car..jangan jadik cam mawi..kete 2-3 bijik, lesen pon takde..

kayla..very sleepy.. nite all..